-Chinese Proverb
I know some of you have questions that you are DYING to ask but aren't comfortable asking, so I am posting some questions I think you may have and posting some questions we have gotten recently.
Question: So are you pregnant? I just wanted to make sure.
Answer: Yep, totally pregnant, 16 weeks as of this post. I am due August 31st. And yes, Kate is the one who is pregnant, in case that is not clear.
Question: But, ummm, HOW are you pregnant?
Answer: We did In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). You know, a test tube baby. If you want to read more, check out this link: http://americanpregnancy.org/infertility/in-vitro-fertilization
Question: Do you know the father of the baby?
Answer: We actually prefer the term "donor" and no we do not. We selected him from sperm bank and he met some very specific health criteria (no family history of cancer, mental illness, or heart disease) along with some cosmetic and personality traits. We chose a donor that has straight brownish blonde hair and blue eyes like Alisha and shares some of her strengths (like Math) and hobbies (like music). Although these were secondary to the health characteristics, we were lucky we found someone that matched all of our requirements.
Question: Who's egg did you use?
Answer: Kate's. Although we really wanted to use Alisha's eggs, she just could not go to all the doctor's appointments required. Kate was at the doctor every other day for ultrasound and blood work for three weeks. There was NO way Alisha could take that much time off work. Also, Alisha isn't the best at medical stuff. She was great at jabbing me with needles though, kudos. It wasn't a deal breaker for us anyways, Alisha is 100% the second parent of this baby.
Question: So, will Alisha be the legal second parent?
Answer: Yep! Since she is Kate's legal spouse, she gets to be on the birth certificate and everything. Depending on the outcome of the SCOTUS case in June, we may not have to take any additional steps.
Question: So, isn't IVF really expensive? How did you afford it?
Answer: Heck YES it is expensive but we moved to one of the few states that mandates that insurance cover infertility treatment including IVF. There would have been no way we could have afforded this living in Texas. We did have to pay co-insurances though, paid fully by my Jamberry commissions. So thank you for all your orders ;) Enter shameless plug here: http://katesmith.jamberrynails.net/
Question: Did it work the first time?
Answer: That is a loaded question. We kinda had one and a half cycles. The first one, my meds were wrong and I did not produce any eggs. The second time, they fixed my meds and we got plenty of eggs and five healthy embryos. We transferred one of those embryos and that is the baby I am pregnant with! So I got pregnant on our first full IVF cycle.
Question: What are you going to do with all those other embryos? You know life begins at conception Katie.
Answer: Yes, we know Mom. We are going to transfer them all, not all at once though, I would die! There is a chance that not all will survive freezing or transfer but if they do, we will have five babies. Yeah. Five.
Question: What is wrong with you?
Answer: Some people say I am dramatic, but I prefer "intensely invested in the situation."
Question: No, I mean, what's wrong with your parts?
Answer: Oh, sure. Right. Technically, I have "unknown infertility". I don't have PCOS or any other infertility issues, which is why my first cycle didn't get off the ground. They were treating me like I had PCOS and I don't. Just google PCOS, it is way too much to explain! My biggest infertility issue is lack of access to free sperm. Straight girls are lucky in that regard.
Question: Are you finding out the gender of the baby?
Answer: Well, the child won't reveal their gender until adolescence, sometimes earlier. Oh! You mean sex? Right, sorry. We will find out when the baby is born, as will you. Sorry Jessi.
Question: Where are you registered?
Answer: We aren't. We honestly and truly do not need anything for the baby at all. Since we have had two failed adoptions, we have it all (and too much). Wait, I lied, technically we are registered at Nicki's Diapers because Alisha is addicted to cloth diapering, but don't worry about that lol. This also means we do not plan on having a shower, for lots of reasons. We would, however, love, love, LOVE for our Florida people to join us for a meet and greet and joy sharing session with baby Smith when we are home for Christmas. As of right now, we will be in Panama City the days before and including Christmas Eve and in Ocala for Christmas Day and the days after. We do not have details on this yet but we will try to figure something out if people are interested.
Oh and I realize that some people just realllllyyy want to buy us gifts before the baby is born and we really appreciate and understand that. I mean, we aren't going to turn anything down! Paaa-lleeezzee, lol. Southwest giftcards would be an amazing blessing since we will be traveling for Christmas and who doesn't love baby clothes? Good luck finding gender neutral stuff though, geeeeezzee! We do have a TON of newborn and 0-3 stuff, so maybe buy older? I don't know how babies really work to be honest. We just don't want anyone, especially those who bought gifts for our failed adoptions, to feel like the HAVE to or SHOULD buy us gifts. Does that make sense?
If you have more questions, PLEASE send me a message or even comment below. I promise I will answer them the best way I can!!!
And yes, I totally know I switched back and forth from first and third person. Totally annoying, right? Blame it on pregnancy brain. I am sure there are TONS of typos in this too. I will fix it when Alisha tells me all the mistakes I made.
This was one of Alisha's edits. Lawd:
http://www.nickisdiapers.com/giftregistry_home.asp?action=view&id=36223
-Kate
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